Heads You Lose

A Novel

By Lisa Lutz + David Hayward

Blog

What's Happening with Lisa + David around Heads You Lose

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Me, Me, Me

One symptom of Tiny Name Syndrome, a condition afflicting many smaller-font co-authors, is a persistent hunger for greater name recognition. These days, that means Googling yourself. Doing so has taught me that I’m much more interesting than I thought:

“David Hayward is an aesthete, and a long time jazz trumpeter, having worked with Stan Kenton and Janis Joplin. Also, he is a professional astrologist, a freelance editor, a novelist (Heads You Lose), and a respected poet. Mr. Hayward’s poetry is known for its musicality that it is both delightful and provocative, and it deals with most every subject in the universe.” -- New York Journal of Books

I can claim about a third of those qualities; the rest belong to the Los Angeles gentleman who wrote Shorthand of the Soul: The Quotable Horoscope. While I am a Pisces and therefore enjoy karaoke, I am neither an astrologer nor a musician. I suspect the confusion sprung from our shared affinity for poetry as well as our respective collaborations with famous ornery women (Joplin, Lutz).

Look at enough of your namesakes and common characteristics will emerge. Most David Haywards seem to be pinkish blond guys with glasses. We’re differentiated mainly by our relative levels of disrepair, like Ed Begley Jr. at various stages of a prolonged bender. At the shinier end of that spectrum is the web’s number-two David Hayward—a Canadian spiritual advisor, cartoonist, dream interpreter, and musician who’s also known as the Naked Pastor. Even with that killer bio and nickname, he’s ascended as high as he can.

That’s because we real David Haywards all cower in the shadow of our raven-haired overlord. The number one spot is reserved for Dr. David Hayward, the brooding All My Children villain. When his wife finally killed him last year, nonfictional David Haywards glimpsed a wide-open future. Then he strolled into the courtroom of her murder trial and we retreated to our basements and home offices to fine-tune our model trains and sermons and mystery novels.

And we can’t expect much in the way of reinforcements from younger generations—how many of the Daves you know are babies? All our potential young brothers are Aidans and Finns. So it’s up to us. I call upon David Haywards everywhere to join me in a global alliance dedicated to the virtues of unpopular interests, staying out of the sun, and ending the fake doctor’s suave reign. As a bonus, if any of us ever write a book together, there will be just one big name on the cover. And it will be ours.

Read response from Lisa »

The preliminary results are in ...

diagonal image of hanging chads from florida electionFor those of you who have taken some time to peruse this fine new website of ours, you probably noticed a widget at the bottom of the main page that allows you to vote for which author you would prefer to collaborate with. Since the site went public, just a few days ago, the polls have repeatedly shown Dave (David Hayward, my virtually unknown coauthor) in the lead. While his edge is still in the single digits, I find this result baffling, to say the least.

Forgive my hubris, but I am a New York Times bestselling novelist. My Spellman series has been nominated for numerous awards (okay, didn’t win any, but still), garnered some excellent blog reviews (thank you, Scott Butki), and has won over fans not just in the U.S. but across the globe (well, mostly in France--merci). I hear from readers repeatedly who tell me that my books are not just great beach reads, but, more importantly, great hospital reads.

So, I have to wonder why anywhere from 51.2% to 53.9% (last I checked) of the voting public would prefer to collaborate on a novel with Dave. I simply can’t impose any logic on that choice. Firstly, I should point out that the odds of your coauthored book with Dave getting published are probably also in the single digits. If you worked with me, maybe we could make some magic happen, or least get a book published. Secondly, and you won’t know this until you read Heads You Lose, but Dave wouldn’t know a plot point if it weighed 20 pounds and dropped on his head. Thirdly, he writes at a snail’s pace, so I hope you’ve got nothing but time on your hands. Fourthly, he’s a slob. Like an Oscar Madison-caliber slob. And, finally, he’s not naturally blonde (in case your vote was purely aesthetic).

Perhaps, like Dave, you’re a sucker for the underdog. Maybe, also like Dave, you feel bad because his name on the cover isn’t as big as mine. But I earned my font size. Maybe one day Dave will earn his (although not on a coauthored book with me).

One final word: I would like to thank those wise men and women out there who have voted for me. To those of you who have or will vote for Dave, I wish you the best of luck in all your future endeavors. You’re going to need it.

Read response from David »

First!

FIRST!!!

Dr. PhilPardon the enthusiasm, but anytime Lisa's involved, I don't pass up a chance to get the first or last word in. That's just one of the many rules for successful collaboration I learned during the writing of Heads You Lose. Pretty much all the others I got from Dr. Phil's marriage advice. For example, "If you put your relationship in a win/lose situation, it will be a lose/lose situation." And "Sometimes you just have to sit quietly and take the abuse." And "No dog ever peed on a moving car."

Read response from Lisa »

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