Heads You Lose

A Novel

By Lisa Lutz + David Hayward

From our Blog

The preliminary results are in ...

diagonal image of hanging chads from florida electionFor those of you who have taken some time to peruse this fine new website of ours, you probably noticed a widget at the bottom of the main page that allows you to vote for which author you would prefer to collaborate with. Since the site went public, just a few days ago, the polls have repeatedly shown Dave (David Hayward, my virtually unknown coauthor) in the lead. While his edge is still in the single digits, I find this result baffling, to say the least.

Forgive my hubris, but I am a New York Times bestselling novelist. My Spellman series has been nominated for numerous awards (okay, didn’t win any, but still), garnered some excellent blog reviews (thank you, Scott Butki), and has won over fans not just in the U.S. but across the globe (well, mostly in France--merci). I hear from readers repeatedly who tell me that my books are not just great beach reads, but, more importantly, great hospital reads.

So, I have to wonder why anywhere from 51.2% to 53.9% (last I checked) of the voting public would prefer to collaborate on a novel with Dave. I simply can’t impose any logic on that choice. Firstly, I should point out that the odds of your coauthored book with Dave getting published are probably also in the single digits. If you worked with me, maybe we could make some magic happen, or least get a book published. Secondly, and you won’t know this until you read Heads You Lose, but Dave wouldn’t know a plot point if it weighed 20 pounds and dropped on his head. Thirdly, he writes at a snail’s pace, so I hope you’ve got nothing but time on your hands. Fourthly, he’s a slob. Like an Oscar Madison-caliber slob. And, finally, he’s not naturally blonde (in case your vote was purely aesthetic).

Perhaps, like Dave, you’re a sucker for the underdog. Maybe, also like Dave, you feel bad because his name on the cover isn’t as big as mine. But I earned my font size. Maybe one day Dave will earn his (although not on a coauthored book with me).

One final word: I would like to thank those wise men and women out there who have voted for me. To those of you who have or will vote for Dave, I wish you the best of luck in all your future endeavors. You’re going to need it.

Response from David:

Victory speeches should be brief. Today America has spoken, and I stand humbled before its verdict. This one is for dreamers everywhere. For the fourth-grader who pushes back one day and finds that the bully isn’t so tough after all. For the clumsy teen who knows that someday, if he keeps trying, he’ll make that dance team. And for the struggling writer who believes that he can -- no, will -- write the next great American novel. Either that or latch onto the career of a more successful friend and never, ever let go.

P.S. The hair is all real, ladies.

Comments

Ah, but I see the tide is turning.

I’ve got to vote for Lisa even if she thinks that the 9th Doctor is the best Doctor. Looks like the book tour isn’t going to Dallas so it looks like it is time for a road trip to Houston.

Thanks, Jesse! I appreciate your support. Look forward to seeing you in Houston, if you can make it.

I voted for the published author. It seemed the right thing to do.

I am not one to take sides without getting any corresponding benefit. So in the spirit of the Spellmans, I will give my vote to whomever gives me the best deal.

May I suggest an opening offer of an autographed copy of the new book? Bidding is now open…...

Does David have a lot of family members? Or is he allowed to vote too—how many times?
Since I am one of the lucky ones to have read this book already (LOVED IT btw) I sense the need to “win” in your ongoing colaborationship might cause the lines of fairness to become blurred!

Dave indeed has a large family, which might explain some things. And perhaps his poetry fan base is bigger than I thought. But still, even with the polls tipping strongly in my favor, there’s some funny business going on.

So pleased you enjoyed the book. That, at least, is something Dave and I can agree upon.

OK. So maybe I started the bidding a bit high.
How about cash? Cash is good….......!
Five bucks??????? Four?? Do I hear three???

Lisa, When I looked, you were now ahead, and although I loved the Spellman series, I had to vote for David.  I have this thing for underdogs.  Plus, his picture on the authors page kind of looks like Ralphie from “A Christmas Story”

Thanks, Patti, and here’s to Ralphie, aka Messy Marvin. NEVER to be confused with that overrated poseur Cousin Oliver. http://bit.ly/h7aMLV

The people who voted for Dave either fear wealth and fame or have egos so fragile that working with a genius would unhinge them.

I just finished reading Heads You Lose, and I LOVED it!

I don’t want to let the cat out of the bag, Lisa, but I think I know why Dave is leading in the polls here. Sometimes when small animals are threatened, even in jest, the claws come out of the cat voting people block. For every cute kittie video on the internet, there’s a psycho behind the camera who thinks the world revolves around his/her pussy.

Keeping with the animal metaphor, I believe the horse has left the barn.  While you may both be “good” writers independently; together you are great. Great in the sense of the sum is greater than the parts. Great in the Simon and Garfunkle, Sonny and Cher, Captain and Tennille kind of way. Please don’t stop making beautiful music together.

Having said that, if I had to choose either one of you to co-author a book with, I would choose, hmmmm; that’s like asking me which leg I like better. I’ll have to get back to you on that.

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